If my personal story hasn’t shown you that you can succeed, let me elaborate further. In this section, we will examine our habits and why we have been winning this whole time.
Analyze your daily habits. Where do your faults lie? Do you overeat, not go to the gym, or have financial issues? Is every day filled with bad habits? Do you think you can be more at your job? Are tasks piling up because of procrastination?
At home or in your career, do you rush to get things done because you have put them off for so long? Is the worry of meeting deadlines always overbearing due to not taking action?
We are succeeding in justifying our actions at all times. If you answered yes to the questions above, you are confirming laziness. You flourish in procrastination. Not to mention, other areas of your life are probably lacking as well.
The lesson here is to ask why you are letting these things happen. Why are we taking action on things that do not get us closer to our goals? How come we know what we must do but constantly sabotage ourselves?
This is why I talked about my marriage. Our beliefs dictate our actions. The behavior we act upon is equal to the results we get. The systems we use will create reality. Days, weeks, or months pass without ever moving forward. What are we trying to do?
“I will never find my soulmate.” “I am forever doomed to remain overweight.” “Everything I do winds up in failure”, “Nothing I do matters in the grand scheme of things.” This type of thinking cements our reality of losing. To have success, you would have to change the beliefs that you hold so dear.
To achieve your goals, you have to believe your current thought process is incorrect! The idea of changing our entire thought process could keep us in our comfort zone. We can’t change! It goes against everything we stand for!
I benefited from realizing that these thoughts are no one’s fault but my own. No one is to blame for my subconscious whether good or bad. Not my parents, my friends, or my coworkers. To blame others for how we live can mess up our circuitry on many levels. I operated negatively without even realizing it because of blaming those around me.
The ways I hurt myself from blaming others:
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Being 100+ lbs overweight because of the outside stress my environment caused me
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Binge drinking on weekends because I needed to “relax” after a rough work week or a fight with friends or family
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Not allowing myself to find a significant other because of past relationship trauma
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Going into debt because I needed to feed the addiction of having what others had and to impress those around me
This is a small list of many things that hindered my life due to blaming and comparing to others. All the examples above happened to me. Some I am still working through. By living this way, my mind would manifest reasons why I should indulge in these bad habits. It also justified me being an absolute shithead to those that I thought were making my life hell.
What are some ways that this way of thinking has held back your own life? Take a second to list the areas in your life that negative thinking effects. Now, take that list and think about what areas you are successful in. Write down what you come up with.
For example, if you want to be writing a book but don’t start, your thoughts may identify as a lazy person. Every single time you aim to put in the work and don’t, you cement the fact that you are what your brain is telling you. Why do we keep doing this to ourselves? We have these bad habits ingrained in us so deep, we don’t know any other way. Every action, good or bad, has brought us this far in life.
All the successes and failures happened because of our thoughts. At the end of the day, we are still alive and breathing.
When reading this section, do not restrict yourself to only my examples I describe here. They are specific problems that I created throughout the years. Your life could hold victories that I have never been through. After finishing this section, take a step back and analyze all that we discussed. Start to put the puzzle together and formulate, not only a plan but a new way of thinking.
When I spoke about my relationship in the previous section, it is because of these reasons. I wanted the perfect relationship I have seen others have. The fairy tale I made up in my head was unreachable for anybody to achieve. This is not the real world! I created this to compare myself to others and hold my head up high because they didn’t have what my marriage did.
The truth of the matter is that we all have areas of our life like this. It is not only in relationships but in all aspects of our life.
Take an inventory of all the things that you did not do. What made you stay in bad habits instead of executing on good ones? What could we derive from these things that show us we are still succeeding? The arguments we get into with others and ourselves, what is causing this?
I would have every excuse in the book not to clean my house after work. There could be dust bunnies hanging out, dishes to get washed, and bathrooms to clean. I would sit there and tell myself that work was too hard today to keep working when I got home. While not good habits perse, I was successful in being lazy.
Sometimes the lengths I would take to stay comfortable are astonishing.
The good part is that I noticed these behaviors. It shows that I am built for success. Lots of people would go about their day thinking this was fine. I do not. What all this taught me is that whatever I set my mind to, I will achieve. Even if that achievement is laziness or procrastination.
The power lies within your own mind, how will you use it? Will it be for good or bad? Both are achieving and succeeding at something, which would you choose?
As of this reading, you may think that there is nothing you can do to break these negative thought patterns. You are forever destined to be overweight, lazy, and a loser.
I am here to tell you that that is not the case. We can use our minds to think about the ways we wish we could. The shift has to be from the negative to a positive. We are built for success, we need to start steering the ship towards what we really desire. The ship needs to sail towards the positive. We have the brainpower to do it, we have been doing it for things that make us mad for years. Why not start using that same power to steer the ship towards a life of change and abundance?
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